Project 365: Day 12 Labor Day

While I complain daily of heavy traffic jams, slow service in restaurants and not having enough money to buy the latest IT bag, somewhere out there, someone is at least a hundred times worse off. Celebrating one of the greatest moments of my life so far (BABY NEWS!!!), I went to Greenbelt to unwind and shop.

While there, I am made aware of my middle-class status by all the price tags in the stores I entered. I felt really depressed that one handbag cost more than a year of working my ass off. All the women in their expensive heels and wielding the latest smart phone seemed to belittle me with their mere presence. I wanted to go home but at the same time I wanted to stay just to watch how the blessed people live a day in their lives.

While walking around and seeing people with perfect hair, perfect teeth, perfect posture and perfect grammar have their meriendas, I wanted to grab a knife and highjack their lives. I felt like the pathetic, working girl looking in from the cold. I went to the watering hole of middle class people: Starbucks. I bought a drink, the whoopie pie featured in the photo and sat down on one of the benches.

How can I think of being afflicted with a pauper’s life when just this morning I was speaking to my driver about HIS life. Today, he said that he would take the afternoon off to arrange his kid’s christening. I thought it was just because it was a holiday but he said it was because there was a “binyagan ng bayan” in their place. He said that he fought with his wife about the expenses for an unplanned event. He said, they couldn’t afford the 3000 pesos for the reception at their home after. But he said his wife argued that their kid is already 2 years old and needs to be christened.

The realization on how I can be so ungrateful for all my blessings pierced through my ego. How can I boast of so much learning on college and in life when I can forget all that I have known? I have been sulking because I cannot afford to buy from the Hermes store and someone I see everyday can’t even afford to spend on such relatively small expenses. Now, I want to punish myself for thinking so small and so shallow.

Eating whoopie pie and sipping on a middle class drink is an unreachable dream for a lot of people. I enjoyed it for a few more moments and lived the life. It’s not worthy of mention in lifestyle magazines but at least I have the luxury to sulk about my so-called cursed life. That in itself is a luxury most people do not have. They go through life every day hoping to survive until the next. Their only choice is to be happy with what they have and today, I decided to be happy with my whoopie pie.